What I Learned from Being a Bi-vocational Pastor

Today I attended the funeral of a 95 year-old man. He was a bi-vocational minister. He paid the bills by working as an electrician.  But his calling drove him to the tent revivals and churches.

Bi-vocational pastors serve outside the spotlight. In my denomination, however, approximately half of all pastors are bi-vocational. They are many, but they get only a fraction of attention given to pastors of larger churches. They receive little recognition, but they are the workhorses of churches that do much of the heavy lifting.

Though I now pastor full-time, I served for two years as a bi-vocational pastor of a tiny church in central Kentucky. We started with 6 people. It was my first pastorate, and I had no idea what I was doing. I drove 2 hours one-way to get there. My preaching was awful, and I had to lead music with a karaoke machine while my girlfriend (now wife) played an out-of-tune piano. The church was dying. The people were tired. The building was falling apart. And there was no air-conditioning.

I loved that church. Still do.

The people forgave my less-than-spectacular sermons. I encouraged them to reach outward. And, truly by the grace of God, the little church grew. Not to 500. Or 250. Or even 100. More like 40. But we knew God was working. It was great.

God revealed much to me while I was their pastor. I know I learned more from them than they got out of my sermons. I’ve still got a long way to go, but let me share with you a few things I figured out during my short time as a bi-vocational pastor.

Ministry is not about ideals. I had several ideals, a big vision, and grand hopes for the little church. My plans were not wrong. But the people had heard it all before from other short-term pastors. I learned that before a church family follows the grand vision of a new pastor, you must first love them where they are.

Ministry means working alongside people. One of our first projects was to paint the church and install air-conditioning. If I hadn’t shown up with a paintbrush in hand on work day, then I would have lost the respect of the people. At the end of the work day, the folks gave me the honor of painting the church bell red—it was a big deal.

Ministry requires you to laugh at yourself. I made more mistakes than I had successes as a younger pastor. And the people knew it. You can laugh at yourself and help everyone feel comfortable. Or you can pretend and make everyone feel awkward (or angry).

Ministry means loving people deeply. I will never forget the gifts people gave Erin and me when we left the small church. The church was poor, but the people lavished love on us. I didn’t deserve it, but they gave anyway. The love between a church and pastor should be like nothing else. I pray they understand how much I loved them.

I wasn’t a great bi-vocational pastor (or even close), but there are many who have served faithfully for years. They love their churches. Their churches love them. And God’s Kingdom is larger because of their faithfulness.

Welcoming Maggie Elizabeth Rainer!

No words can describe. 7 lbs 9 oz. I love her so much.

Why I’m Proud of My Dad

I spoke the below words in 2006 at my father’s inauguration to be president of LifeWay Christian Resources. I think no less of my father today.

I can vividly recall the first time I failed at something. It was a new school year, and my second grade teacher had just returned the first quiz. I was somewhat pleased because I got half the questions right for a grade of 50%. One of my classmates then informed me that getting half right meant I received an ‘F.’ I didn’t believe him, and I decided to ask my Dad—who knew everything. When I stepped off the bus, I saw my father sitting on the outside steps of our seminary apartment. He was enjoying the sunshine reading a book and waiting for me to return home.

When he told me my classmate was correct, I was devastated. Even then I had an internal fear of failing. But my father quelled my fear. The words he said still echo with me today.

He said, “I’m proud of you. You are going to have to work a little harder, but I’m proud of you. And I know that you can do it.” These words never left me, and they never will.

Now the coin has flipped, and I get to say how proud I am of my father:

• I’m proud of how he puts family first, always. I could always count on Dad to be at every one of my basketball games.
• I’m proud of his sense of humor – how he lifts the spirits of those around him. And how he could lift the spirits of our family when times were tough.
• I’m proud of his love for the local church, and how he taught me that the gospel message should be shared at all costs with anyone and everyone.
• I’m proud of how he continually encourages me and supports me in my ministry. I know I can count on him to pick up his phone to answer a quick question, even when he is in a meeting.
• I’m extremely proud to stand here and say that he fought side-by-side with the most courageous and inspiring woman I know, praying and standing by her side until her cancer was defeated.
• I’m so thankful for how he and Mom modeled a marriage for me. Now that I am getting married next New Year’s Eve, I can confidently say I know what it means to love someone so deeply and unconditionally that you would die for her because it was modeled for me all my life.
• I’m proud to tell you that he took the time every night when I was a child to pray with me at my bedside, instilling in my heart the utter importance of prayer.

Dad, I’m proud of you for many reasons. You have accomplished all sorts of things in your life. And I don’t have a doubt that several more big successes are right around the corner. And you have done an incredible job of raising Art, Jess, and me (with a little help from Mom).

Despite all your accolades, despite all your honors and accomplishments, I am most proud of you for one thing. It isn’t the accomplishments. It isn’t the way you raised me, nor the support you give me and my brothers. It isn’t even how deeply you love Mom, and the way you modeled a godly husband.

No, it isn’t any of these things.

Dad, I am most proud of you because you are so proud of Jesus. And you took the time to share Him with me.

Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I love you.

The Most Difficult Leadership Question

I recently spent some time at the United States Naval Academy in Annapolis, MD for my PhD program. A retired Colonel gave a lecture to my cohort. What he taught is one of the best leadership lessons on humility I’ve ever heard. Allow me to share the highlights of his lecture.

It’s the hardest leadership question to answer: Am I humble?

Humility is the most difficult leadership trait to determine about ourselves. And pride is the most dangerous leadership trait. Arrogance is the root leadership problem. Our sin nature propels us to an excessive and unhealthy focus on ourselves.

It’s the quintessential leadership struggle. We stand on a sliding scale somewhere between healthy humility and unhealthy pride. Even at our best, determining where we are on this scale is tough. We almost always believe we are more humble than we really are. We rarely recognize our pride until it’s too late.

Fortunately, there are three key questions to ask to reduce the potential for pride to puff up.

Do you know your job, and are you striving to learn more? This question involves competence. Quite frankly, do you know what you’re doing? Too many leaders fake it. Too many leaders do not want to swallow pride and ask for help. Too many leaders fear looking small by admitting they do not understand something. A lack of competence causes many leaders to guide an organization or church into unnecessarily risky waters.

Are you willing to sacrifice your career to do right thing? This question involves courage. Leaders must be willing to make the hard and right decision no matter what the cost. Too many leaders make safe (but wrong) decisions because they fear personal repercussions. Integrity means making the tough decisions and taking the heat. Integrity means verbally admitting fault when you’re wrong.

Do you care about your followers as much as yourself? This question involves compassion. Do you love the people you’re leading? If you don’t, then why lead them? And why would they trust you? Don’t leave unresolved conflict with your followers. Don’t get offended every time a direct report corrects you. Don’t be resistant to help from teams you manage. Be concerned about people on your leadership periphery—those that are on the outskirts of your leadership oversight. Do you know their names? Be a human leader, even if it’s not on your job description. Hob knob with quarterbacks and coaches—that’s important—but never forget the name of the person carrying the water bottles.

The personal virtue of humility is a constant battle, but the most important one. Humility is a daily decision and a lifetime commitment. Leaders are doomed to short-term, arrogant decisions without competence, courage, and compassion. We can fool ourselves by losing focus on who we really are. When the aura of the position gets in the way of serving, we are no longer fit for the position. Ultimately, we are merely pots. God is the Potter. He has ultimate control. And we should lead like we believe it.

What is Often Overlooked in Strategy

You are always communicating something. Body language, spoken words, which events you attend or do not attend—all send signals. And one of a leader’s key goals is reducing uncertainty—or ambiguity—by communicating the right information in the right amounts to the right people. Church leaders create strategies for growth, discipleship, worship experience, among many other things. What is often left out of these strategies, however, is a detailed plan for communicating.

Without proper communication, ambiguity and uncertainty replace strategy implantation. In many cases, the difference between dreams (non-implemented ideas) and vision (implemented ideas) is appropriate communication. I’ve seen some of my good ideas fail because I did not communicate properly. I’m sure many of you have experienced the same.

Communication strategy begins with how you treat people—your philosophy of leadership. Are people assets or pawns? Do you believe in investing in people or using them? Does the organization serve the people or do the people serve the organization?

The church organization has needs. People serving the church have needs. The best communication engages the talents and gifts of people, clarifies the organization’s needs, and then fits the match between the two.

Every church is unique, so each will have a different context, culture, gift set, and structure. Therefore, no one communication strategy exists. But let me share with you a few factors to consider when communicating.

Self-awareness. How do people typically respond to you? If you have trouble engaging several people, then the problem may be more with your leadership than with your followers. Know what you are signaling. Are you encouraging participation or stifling other’s voices? Are your self-descriptions different from reality?

Size. Your communication style should vary according to the size of the group. What once worked for a small team at a smaller church may need to change as you grow. Typically, the larger the group is, the more formal the communication method. If you use formal communication strategies with informal small groups, you will most likely encounter friction (and it’s usually in the form of deserved sarcastic remarks behind your back).

Setting. Match the style with the situation. An all-staff email surprising everyone about a big change is never a good idea. In a stable environment, communicating a simple message top-down through hierarchical channels is fine. A complex problem, however, requires more lateral communication in smaller group settings.

Structure. Even in formal ministry silos, responsibilities overlap. For instance, bringing on a new staff person requires meeting with both the personnel and budget teams. Putting on a children’s musical falls to both the children’s pastor and worship pastor. Be consistent with each group. Communicating with each group at the same time saves time and helps with a coherent message.

Culture. Is your church tight or loose? Do your people value creativity or clarity? Are the people information-inundated or under-communicated? You must track the pulse of church culture in order to communicate effectively.

People. Pick the right people. Communicating the right message with the wrong person is a common leadership mistake.  Communicating the wrong message to the wrong person is disastrous.

Technology. Understand your technology.  What methods of communication are available to you? What new methods might be beneficial to your congregation? We are now in an era when people have instant access to all sorts of information—be selective in what you communicate in each medium.  For instance, don’t use sign-up sheets on bulletin boards with a Facebook culture.

Goal. Asking key givers to get on board with a building campaign is much different than recruiting volunteers for the student mission trip. Both are critically important—each goal, however, is quite different. How you communicate to each group should differ depending on the goal.

Transparency. Transparency is a must for leadership. Be transparent, but know when not to say something. Some issues are highly sensitive. Some things very few people need to know. One of the most common leadership blunders is saying too much in the name of transparency.