Pastoral Leadership during Potential Conflict 101

Every position of leadership has its nuances. We pastors are no different. Those of us who shepherd God’s people have unique demands and quirks that come with our leadership roles in ministry. And in my three years as a pastor, I’ve learned the hard way that some secular leadership models simply do not work in the church.

A seasoned pastor bristling with sagacity recently reminded me of several characteristics of sound pastoral leadership, specifically relating to potential conflict within the church. I’ll share them with you.

Always tell the truth (even when it hurts)
Be transparent to prevent misperceptions of hiding information
Show humility in all situations
Do not attack those who attack you
Do not engage in malicious gossip
Love the people
Keep focused on the main things
Deal squarely and fairly with the issues
Be open with the people
Allow people the opportunity to vent and ask questions if needed
Keep your composure
Watch God work in the midst of negative events
Take a conflict and turn it into an opportunity
Be prepared and present the facts with clarity and composure
Pray constantly
Seek the counsel of key people in the church
Seek the counsel of those wiser than you
Work unceasingly to see the matter to resolution
Do not encourage conflict, but do not avoid necessary conflict
Demean no one
Never yield to ultimatums
Keep important records and documentation
Never let conflict (or your leadership) be about you
Show much compassion

Anything else that can be added to the list?

Post-Christian Church Planting

This video is an excellent conglomeration of stats concerning the state of the church in America today.

Thanks go to my cousin David for the link.

Jesus Stopped

I like to stay busy. If I have down time, I fill it with something. It’s my greatest strength and weakness. I’m goal oriented, but I have a tendency to let relationships in my life slip in order to achieve goals.

This past week I had a wake-up call, one that made me realize how important people are, and how much less important it is to achieve personal goals. This week I also learned how sometimes we have to stop. I had surgery to remove a tumor on my thyroid, and it amazed me how my family and friends surrounded me during my recovery. Though the surgery was relatively minor, and I’m already back in action, God used this down time to show me that relationships with others are essential to spiritual health. I saw how my personal goals, though necessary, are not topmost.

Jesus knew the purpose for his life. He came to be a ransom for many. He came to save a world. Walking to Jerusalem through Jericho, He was aware that the goal of the cross was quickly approaching. He was marching to Calvary. He was close to fulfilling his mission.

The crowds had gathered as he walked. But a voice cried out. It was Bartimaeus, a blind beggar. He was crying for mercy.

Jesus could have traveled on, rationalizing that the ultimate goal was to arrive at the cross. He could have continued without stopping, telling himself that he must not be distracted by the one in order to save the many. After all, human destiny hung in the balance. He was on his way to save the world. Time was critical. The entirety of humanity’s salvation was at stake. What did he do when he heard Bartimaeus’ cries?

Jesus stopped.

I consider myself a busy person. I have “important” things to do during the day. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have time for people.

I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of a more important thing than saving humankind from sin. That was Jesus’ goal. That’s what He was busy with. Yet He stopped for this man. And because Jesus listened to Bartimaeus’ cries for mercy, this blind beggar was healed physically and spiritually.

The people who care about me stopped this past week. They cared for and prayed for me while I recovered from surgery. It meant more to me than they realize.

Perhaps we could stop a little more. Perhaps I could not focus so much on personal goals and more on the needs of people around me, those I know and those I do not. Perhaps such a focus might mean that more people see Jesus in me. Perhaps they might come to know Jesus because I stopped and helped them.

The Self-Indulgent Church

This from the Christian Post:

A cutting-edge church leader known for his innovative ideas on reaching a post-modern generation for Christ contends the reason why churches are declining in America is because they are self-centered.

“My primary assessment would be because American Christians tend to be incredibly self-indulgent so they see the church as a place there for them to meet their needs and to express faith in a way that is meaningful for them,” said cultural architect Erwin McManus, lead pastor at Mosaic Church in Los Angeles, to The Christian Post Monday.

“There is almost no genuine compassion or urgency about serving and reaching people who don’t know Christ,” he added.

These words are hard-hitting, and my first reaction was that they were too harsh. But a benevolence opportunity at my church on Thursday would make me rethink these thoughts.

One of many tug-of-wars that pastors and lay leaders face in the church is how to balance meeting the physical, social, and spiritual needs of others while at the same time proclaiming that the church isn’t about them. The Bible is replete with verses on caring for and taking in the needy. It is also saturated with the theme “die to self.” Inevitably, the church that follows the biblical mandates of compassion will attract many who come to have their needs met. The goal is to meet these needs so that they can then move forward in a relationship with Christ and be His disciple, which is the only real cure for a needy person.

I found myself flat on my back after battling this tug-of-war on Thursday. I was riding high after our church was able to help a gentleman keep his gas on (we’re expecting wind chills around 20-below tonight, so heat is a necessity this week). Later that same afternoon, another lady came in seeking help. My secretary recognized her as someone who “makes the rounds” asking for money. While I heard the conversation between my secretary and the lady from the front office, I was busy working on my sermon, so I didn’t even go greet her. We just helped someone else, so we’ve done enough this week. Such were my sinful, self-indulgent thoughts. Satan gave a great tug on the rope, and I ended face deep in spiritual mud. The lady left. I never even saw her face. The gospel message left unshared.

This lady’s merit is not the issue. My heart is the issue.

There is almost no genuine compassion or urgency about serving and reaching people who don’t know Christ.

Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of Mine, you did for Me.

Lord, I repent of my own spiritual self-indulgence. Please keep sending people in need to our church. And send us to those in need.

It’s time to make a transition: from spiritual self-indulgence to urgent compassion.

Our Faith Inside and Outside the Church

New NAMB and LifeWay research adds statistical meat to the ongoing conversation: unchurched Americans are open to spiritual matters, but not the institutional church. Below are some data blurbs from the study:

79% of the unchurched agree that “Christianity is more about organized religion than about loving God and loving people.”

89% of the unchurched agree that “I have at least one close friend who considers himself or herself a Christian.”

78% of the unchurched agree that “if someone wanted to tell me what he or she believed about Christianity, I would be willing to listen.”

86% of the unchurched agree that “I can have a good relationship with God without being involved in church.”

71% of the unchurched agree that “believing in Jesus makes a positive difference in someone’s life.”

61% of the unchurched agree that “the God of the Bible is no different from gods or spiritual beings depicted by world religions such as Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, etc.”

48% of the unchurched agree that “there exists only one God, the God described in the Bible.”

There are some hard to swallow dichotomies uncovered in this study. On the one hand, 9 of 10 people outside of the church think they know a Christian. But on the other hand they clearly don’t know the one true God that makes the Christian. On the one hand, 7 of 10 people outside the church maintain a positive view of Jesus. But on the other hand, many of the Christians they know aren’t conveying the most important message of all time, Jesus’ good news. On the one hand, HALF of those outside the church are close to an understanding of our God, the God of the Bible. But despite this closeness, it doesn’t appear that there are any Christians in proximity to them willing to help guide them to know our God!

Without a doubt, we’ve got work to do concerning the views of the church from the outside. But we’ve also got to work harder at telling others about what we truly believe, what’s written on the inside of our hearts. After all, it’s the same faith on the inside of the church as the outside. The church is critically important. But perhaps we need to begin personally with telling outsiders about the faith that’s on the inside. Then maybe the world will realize that the “church” is “us.”

Pithy and challenging as usual, Ed Stetzer sums it up well: Increasingly, the God Americans believe in looks less like the God described in the Bible. They are a long way from where people were 100 years ago, when there was more of a consensus about who God is. That is a rebuke to us as Christians and, at the same time, a challenge. What is it about the faith we live that causes our culture to like Jesus but reject the church?

What’s your take on these latest statistics?