Pastoral Leadership during Potential Conflict 101

Every position of leadership has its nuances. We pastors are no different. Those of us who shepherd God’s people have unique demands and quirks that come with our leadership roles in ministry. And in my three years as a pastor, I’ve learned the hard way that some secular leadership models simply do not work in the church.

A seasoned pastor bristling with sagacity recently reminded me of several characteristics of sound pastoral leadership, specifically relating to potential conflict within the church. I’ll share them with you.

Always tell the truth (even when it hurts)
Be transparent to prevent misperceptions of hiding information
Show humility in all situations
Do not attack those who attack you
Do not engage in malicious gossip
Love the people
Keep focused on the main things
Deal squarely and fairly with the issues
Be open with the people
Allow people the opportunity to vent and ask questions if needed
Keep your composure
Watch God work in the midst of negative events
Take a conflict and turn it into an opportunity
Be prepared and present the facts with clarity and composure
Pray constantly
Seek the counsel of key people in the church
Seek the counsel of those wiser than you
Work unceasingly to see the matter to resolution
Do not encourage conflict, but do not avoid necessary conflict
Demean no one
Never yield to ultimatums
Keep important records and documentation
Never let conflict (or your leadership) be about you
Show much compassion

Anything else that can be added to the list?

Post-Christian Church Planting

This video is an excellent conglomeration of stats concerning the state of the church in America today.

Thanks go to my cousin David for the link.

Jesus Stopped

I like to stay busy. If I have down time, I fill it with something. It’s my greatest strength and weakness. I’m goal oriented, but I have a tendency to let relationships in my life slip in order to achieve goals.

This past week I had a wake-up call, one that made me realize how important people are, and how much less important it is to achieve personal goals. This week I also learned how sometimes we have to stop. I had surgery to remove a tumor on my thyroid, and it amazed me how my family and friends surrounded me during my recovery. Though the surgery was relatively minor, and I’m already back in action, God used this down time to show me that relationships with others are essential to spiritual health. I saw how my personal goals, though necessary, are not topmost.

Jesus knew the purpose for his life. He came to be a ransom for many. He came to save a world. Walking to Jerusalem through Jericho, He was aware that the goal of the cross was quickly approaching. He was marching to Calvary. He was close to fulfilling his mission.

The crowds had gathered as he walked. But a voice cried out. It was Bartimaeus, a blind beggar. He was crying for mercy.

Jesus could have traveled on, rationalizing that the ultimate goal was to arrive at the cross. He could have continued without stopping, telling himself that he must not be distracted by the one in order to save the many. After all, human destiny hung in the balance. He was on his way to save the world. Time was critical. The entirety of humanity’s salvation was at stake. What did he do when he heard Bartimaeus’ cries?

Jesus stopped.

I consider myself a busy person. I have “important” things to do during the day. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have time for people.

I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of a more important thing than saving humankind from sin. That was Jesus’ goal. That’s what He was busy with. Yet He stopped for this man. And because Jesus listened to Bartimaeus’ cries for mercy, this blind beggar was healed physically and spiritually.

The people who care about me stopped this past week. They cared for and prayed for me while I recovered from surgery. It meant more to me than they realize.

Perhaps we could stop a little more. Perhaps I could not focus so much on personal goals and more on the needs of people around me, those I know and those I do not. Perhaps such a focus might mean that more people see Jesus in me. Perhaps they might come to know Jesus because I stopped and helped them.

The Self-Indulgent Church

This from the Christian Post:

A cutting-edge church leader known for his innovative ideas on reaching a post-modern generation for Christ contends the reason why churches are declining in America is because they are self-centered.

“My primary assessment would be because American Christians tend to be incredibly self-indulgent so they see the church as a place there for them to meet their needs and to express faith in a way that is meaningful for them,” said cultural architect Erwin McManus, lead pastor at Mosaic Church in Los Angeles, to The Christian Post Monday.

“There is almost no genuine compassion or urgency about serving and reaching people who don’t know Christ,” he added.

These words are hard-hitting, and my first reaction was that they were too harsh. But a benevolence opportunity at my church on Thursday would make me rethink these thoughts.

One of many tug-of-wars that pastors and lay leaders face in the church is how to balance meeting the physical, social, and spiritual needs of others while at the same time proclaiming that the church isn’t about them. The Bible is replete with verses on caring for and taking in the needy. It is also saturated with the theme “die to self.” Inevitably, the church that follows the biblical mandates of compassion will attract many who come to have their needs met. The goal is to meet these needs so that they can then move forward in a relationship with Christ and be His disciple, which is the only real cure for a needy person.

I found myself flat on my back after battling this tug-of-war on Thursday. I was riding high after our church was able to help a gentleman keep his gas on (we’re expecting wind chills around 20-below tonight, so heat is a necessity this week). Later that same afternoon, another lady came in seeking help. My secretary recognized her as someone who “makes the rounds” asking for money. While I heard the conversation between my secretary and the lady from the front office, I was busy working on my sermon, so I didn’t even go greet her. We just helped someone else, so we’ve done enough this week. Such were my sinful, self-indulgent thoughts. Satan gave a great tug on the rope, and I ended face deep in spiritual mud. The lady left. I never even saw her face. The gospel message left unshared.

This lady’s merit is not the issue. My heart is the issue.

There is almost no genuine compassion or urgency about serving and reaching people who don’t know Christ.

Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of Mine, you did for Me.

Lord, I repent of my own spiritual self-indulgence. Please keep sending people in need to our church. And send us to those in need.

It’s time to make a transition: from spiritual self-indulgence to urgent compassion.

Our Faith Inside and Outside the Church

New NAMB and LifeWay research adds statistical meat to the ongoing conversation: unchurched Americans are open to spiritual matters, but not the institutional church. Below are some data blurbs from the study:

79% of the unchurched agree that “Christianity is more about organized religion than about loving God and loving people.”

89% of the unchurched agree that “I have at least one close friend who considers himself or herself a Christian.”

78% of the unchurched agree that “if someone wanted to tell me what he or she believed about Christianity, I would be willing to listen.”

86% of the unchurched agree that “I can have a good relationship with God without being involved in church.”

71% of the unchurched agree that “believing in Jesus makes a positive difference in someone’s life.”

61% of the unchurched agree that “the God of the Bible is no different from gods or spiritual beings depicted by world religions such as Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, etc.”

48% of the unchurched agree that “there exists only one God, the God described in the Bible.”

There are some hard to swallow dichotomies uncovered in this study. On the one hand, 9 of 10 people outside of the church think they know a Christian. But on the other hand they clearly don’t know the one true God that makes the Christian. On the one hand, 7 of 10 people outside the church maintain a positive view of Jesus. But on the other hand, many of the Christians they know aren’t conveying the most important message of all time, Jesus’ good news. On the one hand, HALF of those outside the church are close to an understanding of our God, the God of the Bible. But despite this closeness, it doesn’t appear that there are any Christians in proximity to them willing to help guide them to know our God!

Without a doubt, we’ve got work to do concerning the views of the church from the outside. But we’ve also got to work harder at telling others about what we truly believe, what’s written on the inside of our hearts. After all, it’s the same faith on the inside of the church as the outside. The church is critically important. But perhaps we need to begin personally with telling outsiders about the faith that’s on the inside. Then maybe the world will realize that the “church” is “us.”

Pithy and challenging as usual, Ed Stetzer sums it up well: Increasingly, the God Americans believe in looks less like the God described in the Bible. They are a long way from where people were 100 years ago, when there was more of a consensus about who God is. That is a rebuke to us as Christians and, at the same time, a challenge. What is it about the faith we live that causes our culture to like Jesus but reject the church?

What’s your take on these latest statistics?

Faith and Power

While on vacation I read Michael Lindsay’s book, Faith in the Halls of Power. In the book, he discusses how numerous evangelicals have reached high-profile leadership positions in some of the most powerful circles in the United States. Lindsay spent five years interviewing 360 of these influential Christians in America. His conclusion: evangelical influence is more prevalent than many tend to believe or report. He found four major arenas in which these Christian leaders maintain this power in secular society: politics, media/arts, academia, and business. Though the book covers a variety of topics, let me share with you a few of his findings about this evangelical power group that I find particularly fascinating:

• Over half (56%) of these power figures came to Christ after age 17. And about one-quarter of them were not raised in churchgoing homes.
• The top 5% of all evangelical donors give half (51%) of all charitable dollars given by evangelicals.
• Many within this group acknowledge that the church was the first place where they expressed their talents. Through the church, they were given the freedom, support, and encouragement to practice, fine-tune, and improve upon their skills that they now utilize in their positions of power.
• Among this group of leaders, 60% have switched denominations and/or churches. This church-swapping figure increases to 80% among younger leaders.

What I gleaned from his book regarding the church is that God has given the body of believers a unique opportunity to influence culture. As Lindsay states, these leaders are not overtly marrying their faith and work, using their positions to ramrod Christianity to the forefront of the institutions they lead. Rather, they feel a call to influence individuals through their personal witness.

These leaders accept Christ later in life than most, and some have no church background. This decision to follow Christ for them was one that required much thought and reflection. As a result, they tend to view their faith seriously and hold Scripture’s commands in high regard. This level of spiritual maturity is evident in their giving (which Lindsay was able to obtain from most of the interviewees).

What is disheartening about this group is that while they initially connected with the church (utilizing their gifts and abilities within the local body), many of them swap congregations. Some of this church-hopping may be due to the transient nature of their careers, but it cannot account for all of it.

The church, through the influence of these leaders, has a unique opportunity to engage our “elite” culture with the saving message of Jesus Christ. It is my prayer that the church and this power group are able to connect for the furtherance of the Kingdom.

A New Generation of Church Leadership

I’m on vacation with my wife this week, skiing New Mexico in the Sangre de Cristo Mountains. The snow is great and the weather is perfect.

Rainer Ski Report:
Sam = 4 falls and 1 injury (bruised derriere)
Erin = 2 falls and 0 injuries

Erin and I have differing approaches to skiing. I push the boundaries of my abilities; she takes the runs slowly and methodically. But we both plan our runs down the slope. We both think ahead, checking the trail map and the conditions before heading down the mountain.

Since I’m enjoying my time in New Mexico, I’ll make an analogy between successful skiing and successful vision casting.

Accomplishing a ski run requires three decisions made in advance:

1) Choose a trail according to your ability: you don’t want to end up on a lift taking you to the double blacks if you’re still struggling to snow plow.
2) Pick a line: before descending on the chosen trail you must decide which approach or “line” will best get you to the bottom.
3) Watch for unforeseen obstacles: even the best skiers encounter objects they didn’t notice (sometimes the moguls looked easier from the lift).

These same types of decisions play out when casting a vision. Leaders must choose a path – this decision involves long-term goals. Once these goals are identified, an outline is formed to facilitate the progress between point A and Z – this stage involves mid-term decisions. Lastly, even with the most thorough planning, obstacles may appear – like a skier encountering a large rock in the moguls, leaders are often required to make quick and short-term decisions that could affect the entire vision.

One of the biggest obstacles facing the church today: a lack of younger leadership.

As a young leader of a church, my perspective is perhaps different from others. But clearly, many churches are getting older, and church leaders are getting grayer. This trend is alarming not because church members and leaders get older (that’s part of life), but rather because another generation is not rising up behind them. As I’ve mentioned before, 70% of people who drop out of the church do so between the ages of 18 and 22. We’re losing a generation. But since so many are leaving, we’re also losing the ability to train a new generation of leaders to reach their own generation.

In my denomination, recent stats by Ed Stetzer show a precipitous drop in 18-39 year-old participation in the area of church leadership. Worse yet, the trend is accelerating. While some church leaders saw this day coming, most put their heads in the sand. But the giant obstacle is upon us – it’s time to deal with it without harping on the past. Those new leaders beginning to emerge can whine about the lack of planning, but such practices are counter-productive.

Many churches and denominations are at a crossroads – develop a base of younger leaders or continue to tumble down the mountain of irrelevancy. Compounding the problem is that many within the younger generation aren’t growing up and accepting responsibility – see this USA Today article. This problem is not one easily solved. It will require cooperation from both generations. It will require one generation to grow up and another to train up.

The solution comes when we all realize that we’re in a race…together. It’s not a sprint, but a relay. The baton needs to be passed. Passing a baton requires both parties to be running in sync, and the church is not there yet.

But we have time to change course. We’re not so far down the mountain that we’ve missed an opportunity to get on the right trail. We still have a chance to pass the baton without faulting and disqualifying the finish.

The next step requires that we pick a new line. Existing leaders in the church must begin to prepare for this handoff. New leaders must be prepared to take the baton and run with it.

As my father has stated on this subject: We really can do more together than we can do apart. How I pray younger generations can get that. How I pray older generations will teach that in edifying and encouraging ways while incorporating the best of what younger generations have to offer.

I agree with my father – all generations can work together in relevant ways for the sake of the saving message of Jesus Christ. Together we can tackle the mountainous problem of losing a generation for Christ. And I firmly believe the church can avoid a fatal fall. We may have some bruised egos and sore hearts, but the church isn’t broken. Like on an expert ski run, the signs are clear: Danger! Expect Unmarked Obstacles! Clearly, we’ve got some difficult decisions and hard work in front of us. But we don’t have to crash and burn. Rather, I pray we’ll thrive with Christ and revive a lost world.