How to do a Guided Prayer

I recently blogged on baby dedications, and I mentioned we do them during our guided prayer time in the worship service. A pastor posted a few questions about our guided prayer, and I’ll answer them in this blog. Here’s what he asked:

I am interested in your guided prayer time. We are having a problem as we are a quickly growing church and have lots of events and activities added to our schedule every week. We have gotten to the point that every ministry wants to make some sort of announcement. We tried moving the announcements to the end of the service to keep it from interrupting the flow of the service and distracting from worship, but it is still too cumbersome. I am thinking this might be a plausible solution. I have some questions:

1. How do you decide what activities to pray over?
2. How do people respond if you don’t choose their activity?
3. Are you a large church or small church?
4. Does this make a difference in this approach?

Our church council of ministry team leaders decided we would make no announcements and I do not feel that is the right direction, but I don’t want to just shut them down, but would like to provide an alternative. Your answers could help us out of this sticky situation.

Jack Jacob

Jack, first it’s great to hear your church is growing! Obviously, growing pains are inevitable. I agree with your intuition—totally removing announcements from the service hinders your ability to communicate vision. Most announcements need to go; they distract, not assist, worship (nothing kills a worship service like kicking it off with death announcements).

One alternative I’ve found is to make an announcement by praying for an event. Our guided prayer time occurs in the first half of our service, following a few worship songs. It is led by me or another pastor of the church (or someone selected by one of the pastors). This focus helps build a culture of prayer within the church, and it also serves as a way the entire church can pray for one thing corporately. We are a larger church (3 services), so we too have many activities, programs, and events. And yes, they all want to make announcements in the service.

How do we decide what to pray over? Since I instituted this guided prayer time at our church, I ended up being the decision-maker (I work with our worship leaders on time, content, etc). Here are a few general guidelines I consider:

• The item should be church-wide or encompass a large group in the church.
• If the item needs several minutes of explanation, then the guided prayer is not the best way to communicate it.
• If you can’t present the item without a prayerful spirit, then it’s not the best time to do so (I announced our Super Bowl party from the baptistry once…not a good idea).
• If the item does not fit with the theme or flow of the service, then don’t force it.

The guided prayer has enabled us to do some things last minute (Haiti relief, etc), and it serves as a time buffer since we have a tight schedule on Sunday mornings. Honestly, the best part of it all is we pray corporately as a church, which many churches do not have as part of their regular worship services.

The people have responded well at FBC Murray, but I’m blessed to serve at a unified church. And I’ve done the guided prayer for most of my ministry, from a tiny country church to a large multi-site church to FBC Murray. I believe it’s great for any church, no matter what the size.

Thanks for the great question! Anyone else want to add a thought or two?

Dear Maggie

Below is a letter to my daughter—arrival date June 28th—that I included in our church’s weekly newsletter. I thought I might share it with you as well.

Dear Maggie,

We can’t wait for you to arrive! I love you so much. Mom loves you. And our church family loves you. In many ways, you are already blessed. You will be born into a family that loves Jesus, supported by another family—First Baptist Church Murray—that loves Jesus too. You will be born into a great community in a great nation where we are free to worship our Savior. Please don’t ever forget how precious freedom is.

While you are blessed, our family is not perfect. One of my many glaring weaknesses is how I can warp my love for Jesus’ church into workaholism. I am repenting now of my sin of misguided priorities, asking God to shape me into a father who puts his family first. You will also be born into a public life. You did not choose this life; it was one that was foreordained for you through my calling. The life of a pastor and his family is a public one. I can relate. I too grew up a pastor’s kid. It was a lot of fun. But there were a lot of challenges. I will always be there as your dad (and biggest cheerleader) during those challenges.

A church member reminded me today that God in His sovereign will has already prepared for you a spouse. Sometimes church members say silly things. I can’t imagine giving you away, but I know that day will come. This church member reminded me of how I need to pray that God will bless you with a man who loves Jesus. He’s right; I am praying. And until that time comes, I can promise that I will be the overprotective father who won’t let go of his little girl.

My ultimate goal in raising you is simple: to teach you to love Jesus more than anything or anyone else, including me. I pray for the day when you ask Jesus to be your Lord and Savior. I can’t wait to baptize you—my firstborn daughter—as my sister in Christ.

Your dad, mom, and church family love you!

Preparing for pink and purple,

Dad

How to Do a Baby Dedication

Most of you may know from my Twitter and Facebook updates that I’m going to be the dad of a little girl. Maggie Elizabeth is expected to arrive in this world on June 28th! My wife and I could not be more excited. I’m mentally preparing for a new world of pink and purple. I grew up in a household of boys, so I’m one of those clueless, first-time dads.

One of the joys of pastoring is dedicating children to the Lord. It will be special day when Erin and I get to dedicate Maggie. A child dedication is more than a quick prayer and blessing. It’s a challenge to the parents and church family to raise the child to love Jesus more than anything or anyone else. While there’s numerous ways churches do child dedications, let me share with you how I do them at First Baptist Church Murray.

• Rather than a group dedication with several families on Mother’s Day, we do them throughout the year. I try to have only one family dedicate their child in any given service. It allows the church to focus on one child, and it’s a little more special for the family.
• We do these dedications during our guided prayer portion of the service. The guided prayer is a time during each service that I lead. Rather than announcements or recognition times (which can interrupt the flow of the service), I use this time to pray over events, programs, or people of the church. The purpose is twofold: first, to build a culture of prayer being the foundation of every ministry. Second, it allows me to make an announcement, recognition, or do a baby dedication in a way that is appropriate for our worship services.
• I also write a letter to the child—sealed in an envelope—to be opened when the child accepts Christ. I write in the letter that the point of the child’s dedication was for the church and family to raise the child to love Jesus. This letter is given to the parents or guardians of the child at the dedication.
• After presenting the child to the church (it’s always a hit with the congregation), I issue a formal charge to the parents. I challenge them to raise their child in a Christian home and to show the love of Christ to their child.
• Next, I have the congregation stand and issue a challenge to the church. Like the parents, the congregation is to show Christ’s love to the child, but also to support the parents and hold them accountable.
• Our preschool director then gives the parents a children’s Bible, and mom gets a bouquet of flowers.
• The entire process builds up to the most important part of the dedication. Lastly, I call the entire congregation forward to lay hands on the parents, surrounding them in prayer. I then guide a prayer for the congregation and the parents. My prayer is that the Holy Spirit will begin the process of regeneration for the child and that the parents will be obedient in sharing Jesus with their child.

The Future for the Suburban Church: Poorer, Denser, Grayer, and More Diverse

The fastest growing area of poverty in the United States is in the suburb. The Brookings Institute released a report in January that details the change in the U.S. poor population by community type. Here’s one of many findings in their report:

Between 2000 and 2008, suburbs in the country’s largest metro areas saw their poor population grow by 25 percent—almost five times faster than primary cities and well ahead of the growth seen in smaller metro areas and non-metropolitan communities. As a result, by 2008 large suburbs were home to 1.5 million more poor than their primary cities and housed almost one-third of the nation’s poor overall.

Over the course of this decade, two economic downturns translated into a significant rise in poverty, nationally and in many of the country’s metropolitan and non-metropolitan communities. Suburbs saw by far the greatest growth in their poor population and by 2008 had become home to the largest share of the nation’s poor.

I’ve blogged before about the dramatic change occurring in the American suburb. What was once  predominantly full of white, young, middle-class families is now shifting quickly. And many suburban churches are facing the same issues and decisions as urban churches were a generation ago.

Suburbs are getting denser—many of them being retro-fitted with new town centers providing a full slate of amenities within walking distance. Churches that move towards smaller, micro-sites are more likely to reach the segment of the population living here.

Suburbs are graying. The “senior” population will grow 36% between 2010 and 2020 due to the aging Boomer generation. The church that calls the Boomers “seniors” and attempts to reach them with existing models of senior ministry will fail. Just the name alone turns Boomers off—they hate being called seniors.

Suburbs are becoming more diverse. The influx of Latino, black and Asian students accounts for 99% of the increase in the student population of public schools in the suburbs. Suburban churches that remain homogeneous will have an uphill battle reaching the next generation that views heterogeneity as normative. These students will gravitate towards churches that mirror the ethnic diversity of their schools.